Our relationship are so close and families have known us for so long that we come to be vulnerable by the ways they know us. So we often try to protect ourselves from the damage of family. We “manage the damage” from family.

We can choose our friends but not our family. This is sometimes experienced as a loss of choice or victimization that we are stuck in a family.

With the inherent nature of an estate, we are then going to split it into a business — either a financial business or an operating business or both. But we are put into business with people from whom we sometimes have been protecting ourselves.

This can be very hard. And given the money, it makes hard feelings sometimes very likely in the absence of proactive efforts.

Without an opportunity to be expressed, feelings fester, so scheduled family conferences become an essential tool for avoiding the damage of angry family members. Be sure to listen carefully and properly consider everyone’s opinions and feelings.